Cyclist Cynicism

I can't stand cyclists. I know I'm required by law to "Share the Road," but I'm not required to like it. First of all, I hate their stupid tight and bright clothing, except for the fact that the brightness helps me see them. They still look ridiculous, though. I hate their hand signals, too. I don't care where they're going. I especially hate that they want to be part of real traffic, but then they'll break the rules when it suits them. "I'll be the first 'vehicle' in this long line of traffic at the red light. Ooh, no cars are coming. I think I'll just go!" How about you can't have it both ways, Bike Jerks? The worst is when they are riding their stupid bikes to work in the winter. Don't! First of all, aren't you cold in your dumb, tight clothes? I'm not, in my nice, warm car. Also, the roads are narrower due to the snow, and the snowbanks often get so high that visibility is difficult for real commuters. Finally, the ice makes traveling more dangerous for cars and bikes alike, but if some biker takes a spill on the ice right on front of my car, it will be "my fault." NOT FAIR.

In other news, I hate making small talk with strangers. This often happens before or after work with people that work in the same office building. It's so annoying - just because we're in the elevator together doesn't mean you need to break the silence. Talking about the weather or what a long week it's been is unnecessary, unless I know you. Even then, talking about the weather is usually just filler conversation. Don't feel like you have to talk to me because we're sharing space for a few minutes. I know you're trying to be polite, or perhaps you're uncomfortable with silence. I'm not. I don't know your name, just the floor you work on, so I really don't care that you have "a case of the Mondays."